To have a great marriage you must connect and unify with your spouse in your spirit, soul, and body and be “plugged in” to God who made marriage. The mechanism only works if plugged into the power source! One way to connect, unify, and plug in is to bless each other.
Here is a checkup for your marriage paraphrased from Philippians 1:2-11. It is a blessing to speak to your spouse. Can you read this to your spouse and truly mean it?
Grace and peace to you from God our Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ.
Every time I think of you I joyfully thank God that we know God and have each other.
I am confident that God is at work in our lives and that He will finish His work.
I have you in my heart because we share our lives: how we live, how we work, and how we hope and pray, which means I give you grace.
For God is my witness how my great longing for the best for you comes from the depths of desire of what Jesus longs for you.
So I ask God that your love may increase more and more in knowledge and discernment that you may test and approve what is excellent. And that you may be sincere and untarnished by offense until the end of your days. And that you may be continually filled with the fruits of righteousness from Jesus for the glory of God our Father.
Is this your attitude toward your spouse? If so you pass the checkup and are on the road of great marriages! If not, do not worry — now you have identified areas to work on!
Everything worth having takes work, and a great marriage is the most valuable thing you can pursue! If the grass looks greener over the fence, fertilize your own yard! Focus on improving who you are and where you are at, otherwise everywhere you go you will have the same results. A great marriage is well worth anything you have to do to achieve it!
Questions to Ponder
- What joy does your husband or wife bring you? Celebrate what is great!
- Where in your heart is your spouse? How deeply connected are you currently?
- What are the deepest things you share with him or her? How vulnerable are you right now?
- Do you give grace to your husband or wife? Are you their safe zone or penalty box? Are you a nagger or an encourager?
- Do you feel Jesus’ heart and desire for him or her? He sees and loves the best they are right now, and sees their true potential and encourages it.
- How are you helping your spouse have a great life? How do you help them through the day to get beyond surviving to thriving?
- Are you begging God that his or her love may increase so they may test and approve what is excellent? So their soul may be unstained by offense? So they may be filled with the best things God has to offer? So they may bring glory to God?